the smell of dead bodies

I never really cared for meat that much, but my roommate is a vegetarian and I fucking hate her so I make sure to eat meat at least once a day now.

walking around in the park and suddenly this majestic thing walks past

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED ON TWITTER

OMFG I WAS CRYING

if you listen closely, you can hear the tumblr staff laughing at us

[via]

beginning of the year: maybe someone will like me this year

end of year: theres always next year

party at my house

if your jokes more than 2 minutes long you need to not tell that joke